tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post6729744509118598586..comments2023-10-29T10:42:47.796-06:00Comments on Life at 7000 feet: Not so light and happy...mer@lifeat7000feethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07169865790593225070noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-53371352746278994552009-02-18T20:37:00.000-07:002009-02-18T20:37:00.000-07:00I try to be as open as I can. I wrote pretty raw a...I try to be as open as I can. I wrote pretty raw about my struggle with infertility and as much of our life as I can. I'm a pretty optimistic person so I try to look at the world through rose colored glasses anyway. <BR/>There are days that (especially lately) that I want to say more about how being a new mom is HARD but I also don't want to say a word of complaint after all it took to get me here. <BR/>I'm glad you are a very authentic person - that's one reason I love your blog.Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02962409524106496122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-27429193022308637302009-02-15T11:08:00.000-07:002009-02-15T11:08:00.000-07:00I totally understand what you mean! In a way blog...I totally understand what you mean! In a way blogging is an outlet for me, and I want it to be fun, so sometimes I leave out certain things that aren't pleasant. BUT, what I don't leave out...things like autism...are real and it's just our life. I try to write about how it rolls around here. Sometimes it's pretty, sometimes it's not. Thanks for keeping it real, Mer.Leigh Annhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06891397618715040215noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-25125989325066741892009-02-14T21:47:00.000-07:002009-02-14T21:47:00.000-07:00I think blogging is kind of like a teeter totter. ...I think blogging is kind of like a teeter totter. On one side is the people who are TOO real. They air all their dirty laundry, annoyances with their husbands and fights with their boss. On the other end is the syrupy sweet women whose homes never get dirty, whose children never disobey, who cook gourmet meals from scratch 3 times a day 365 days a year. Somewhere in the middle is most of the rest of us. <BR/><BR/>I don't need or want friends who are perfect (they aren't!) nor do I need/want friends that are complete basket cases with major boundary issues. I don't have the emotional energy or time for either right now.<BR/><BR/>I think you do a good job of striking the balance, Mer. I try to do the same. I don't talk about all the negatives in my life because they might wound people I care about. I hope folks understand I don't think I'm perfect. In fact, it's 11:45 pm, I have dirty laundry that was supposed to be washed to day, the baby hasn't had a bath in a week, my fridge needs to be emptied of a few science projects, AND I am still in my pjs from last night. See? <BR/><BR/>Not perfect. Just called to follow the One Who Is Perfection.Stephanie Kayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02976709475515458563noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-61339867784264682632009-02-14T14:28:00.000-07:002009-02-14T14:28:00.000-07:00Great post, Mer. This is one of the reasons I no l...Great post, Mer. This is one of the reasons I no longer read blogs daily. I've cut my reader WAY back, and I usually check in on people once a week. But I'm discovering that this really makes me not so much a part of the blogging community, and I am now trying to decide what will become of my blog.elaine@bloginmyeyehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08631130962694546603noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-32027734279812101012009-02-14T11:11:00.000-07:002009-02-14T11:11:00.000-07:00Mer, I didn't read everyone else's comments..so do...Mer, I didn't read everyone else's comments..so don't know if I am repeating anyone, but here is my opinion.<BR/><BR/>I started my blog so friends and family who live all over the U.S. could see what we are doing. It is not my journal, nor does it act as my friend.<BR/><BR/>I have close friends that I share my struggles with either in person or by email. Since a blog is so public, I don't feel comfortable sharing my heart...it's a privacy issue for me.<BR/><BR/>I don't think I claim to be perfect or always happy on my blog...I just report the things I think Grandma and my friends in NC and other places would be interested in. If I need to share my heart, I call Grandma or my friends and do that.<BR/><BR/>This is an interesting post and good to think about. I plan to go back and read everyone else's thoughts.Leah Bellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03420217459486312117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-36751732309238739372009-02-14T07:43:00.000-07:002009-02-14T07:43:00.000-07:00What a great post - I enjoyed reading it and all t...What a great post - I enjoyed reading it and all the comments too! This is my first time commenting on your blog but I just wanted to say "amen!" :-) I'm a new mom and can I just tell you that there's nothing that makes me feel more sick to my stomach that my friends who act like parenting is easy or they "love everything about it' -- I guess my point is that I dont ever want to be un-authentic to make MYSELF feel better at the expense of others! I'm not naturally a super-open person so I know its hard for me to find a balance on my own blog -- but I do try to "keep it real," even if that doesn't mean I share everything . . . <BR/><BR/>anyways, sorry if this doesn't make much sense - I'm typing one-handed holding a fussy baby as we speak! haha :-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07877682982361449979noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-90349806768424500552009-02-13T23:50:00.000-07:002009-02-13T23:50:00.000-07:00I think the lady you described is a GRANDMOTHER!I think the lady you described is a GRANDMOTHER!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-39081331920411467822009-02-13T19:11:00.000-07:002009-02-13T19:11:00.000-07:00I've always appreciated how authentic both you...I've always appreciated how authentic both you & John are on your blogs. It is refreshing and lends itself to genuine friendships. <BR/><BR/>I think everyone's definition of "being real" can be slightly different based on their own life, perspective and how they communicate on a regular basis. People seem more "real" when they share similarities to the person who is reading. <BR/><BR/>I also really loved what Moriah at "Please Pass the Salt" had to say.Shandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16800875348050052144noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-83086743429883868482009-02-13T18:37:00.000-07:002009-02-13T18:37:00.000-07:00I found your blog through Lauren Kelly's...I agree...I found your blog through Lauren Kelly's...<BR/><BR/>I agree with you wholeheartedly.<BR/><BR/>I started blogging to keep a sort of record of my baby's milestones, and so family who live away can look at pictures and read about what we're up to.<BR/><BR/>However? I totally feel like it's almost a competition sometimes. Who can accomplish more, whose kid is cuter, smarter...other bloggers have actually said to me "Why don't more people comment on my blog?" As if comments should be the reason that they're on here! <BR/><BR/>Listen, if men blogged, they would so not care. It's a woman thing - it's especially a mom thing. An overachiever-mom thing.<BR/><BR/>And I'm just as guilty as the next person out there.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for being real! :)Laurenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10685771837066772269noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-19503661623985857372009-02-13T17:42:00.000-07:002009-02-13T17:42:00.000-07:00MeredithI really like your thoughts on this subjec...Meredith<BR/>I really like your thoughts on this subject. I often feel the same way about scrapbookers. Yes I know that many people are into it and do a good balance. However, I sometimes found myself wondering why I couldn't find the time or energy to make amazing creations of my own. Then I thought about the time that it would take away from my kids to do it. That was when I decided the blog was a way to sort of "scrapbook" our lives that does not take nearly as much time. Just one perspective.janicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17786856928668599545noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-20347004718513633662009-02-13T16:39:00.000-07:002009-02-13T16:39:00.000-07:00I think this is the first time I have left a post ...I think this is the first time I have left a post on your blog, but I just had to this time! I really do understand what you're talking about. I have to tell you though, I am one of those "real" moms! I pretty much wear my heart on my sleeve and will write about it! Check out this post http://my5blessings.blogspot.com/2008/09/journal-entry.html (if you want to :) and even read the comments. I didn't realize how honest I was until this post! I realized I write more openly than others when so many thanked me for my honesty! Let me tell you, I definitely need to hear others say this mommy stuff is TOUGH! Only by God's grace and strength can I be a mommy to 4 boys so close in age! Keep on blogging, girl...I enjoy reading your blog!Margohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10688372135244319127noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-30309027901039405302009-02-13T11:39:00.000-07:002009-02-13T11:39:00.000-07:00I thought this was really interesting. I can see ...I thought this was really interesting. I can see your point of desiring to be real. One blog I read is by a girl who seems to have her life too together. I've told my husband about her and he nicknamed her "Perfect _____" Once he even asked me, "are her children real or is she just playing with dolls?" <BR/><BR/>I love to read about real life because it encourages me. I know that my life isn't perfect and I can't meet all of my own expectations for myself. It helps to know that others are in the same boat. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for you insight! <BR/>Deena<BR/>Amarillo, TXAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-70884970392491694742009-02-13T10:51:00.000-07:002009-02-13T10:51:00.000-07:00I read your post last night but was so drained fro...I read your post last night but was so drained from making 75 heart shaped brownies, getting the kid's cards/pencils ready for today, and finishing the pen roses for the teachers that I couldn't keep my peepers open any longer. So today I re-read it along with the comments and I've got to say there is a lot of thought provoking comments out there. I love it! <BR/><BR/>I agree with a little from everyone's thoughts. I don't put 'everything out there' on my blog but that's more of a way to keep boundries for my family. I also have family and friends that read my blog so there are times that I put the 'kabosh' on really saying what I want for the mere reason of keeping peace. <BR/><BR/>I totally agree that many people have different reasons for blogging. I think there are great blogs out there and then there are some not so great. I have managed to steer myself away from those that I feel are not in tune to my thoughts/beliefs. <BR/><BR/>I do think it's hard sometimes on blogs because you really don't know the people on the other end. I can say that there are blogs that I have read in the past that I knew I wouldn't be 'friends' with in real life so I stopped reading them. I think that if we were neighbors we'd be friends in real life........same types of thoughts, struggles, faith, etc. <BR/><BR/>Not sure if I answered exactly what you were asking, but know that in this blog of blogs I do care about you! Virtual hugs and a virtual Starbucks to you! :)Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08479553819173503559noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-38179288922695875542009-02-13T10:08:00.000-07:002009-02-13T10:08:00.000-07:00Wow... another email in your 'in box'... sorry. I...Wow... another email in your 'in box'... sorry. I just have to comment... you just made it real! You put it out there... and I love that. My life gets messy, friendships I keep for the sake of keeping them, kids that I love, but that can be disappointing, a husband I admire and love, but can bug... you get the point. I have heard the struggle in your voice for awhile... just be you... I'd rather hear about the real in everyone's life and learn from it then only the great points.<BR/><BR/>I think you need a cup of coffee... you deserve it!Mama Vosshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02117114741064331443noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-81282657803632676052009-02-13T10:01:00.000-07:002009-02-13T10:01:00.000-07:00Just because we chose to edit the ugly (Which I do...Just because we chose to edit the ugly (Which I do in my real life, too- go read my comment on Trish's blog) doesn't mean that it's not real. The problem comes when we compare ourselves with others.<BR/><BR/>I will be the first to admit that I hate certain things about life. That being a mother is HARD. That being married leaves me cold sometimes. <BR/><BR/>But I DO NOT air my dirty laundry for others to see. Either on my blog or in real life. It's not helpful for me to say that Hubbs did XYZ and I am so mad at him. It doesn't help you, it doesn't help me, and it certainly doesn't help marriage.<BR/><BR/>I have learned to be very careful about what I reveal- especially about those who are intimately involved in my life- because people tend to have a long memory about the bad stuff. I may have vented to someone about my husband, forgiven him and moved on. Then, MONTHS later someone will bring up the incident in question and I can tell that I have colored their perception in a negative way.<BR/><BR/>I didn't realize that this was a hot spot with me until my cdomment became a novella. OK, I'll get off my soap box now.Ginahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09818169243613602266noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-81879914139128404072009-02-13T09:26:00.000-07:002009-02-13T09:26:00.000-07:00I can totally relate to having a friend in "real" ...I can totally relate to having a friend in "real" life that is not real and not honest because everything is perfect according to her! It is very fake and annoying! Plus, that type is tough to get to really know because they never let you in with the real issues of their hearts! I tend to move on from that type of friendship too. I just can't relate to those type people!<BR/><BR/>But, in the blog world I think people have different purposes and boundaries about what they put on their blogs. I blog mostly to record cute things my kids do or recently the projects we have been accomplishing on our old home. I know it bores most people but, the aunts and uncles and grandparents love it! <BR/><BR/>I think it is wise to have boundaries about what things you will share and what things you won't share on a blog! I'm not a daily blogger so the daily issues of my life and heart aren't posted on my blog. That's just my preference at this point with being a busy mom of 2 almost 3 little ones.<BR/><BR/>I love reading all types of blogs! Some are transparent,some are more "how to", some on decorating, some on cooking, some on being a christian Mommy, some on infertility, some write about the loss of a child, some write about marriage. I find that some blogs I connect with and some I don't. I keep coming back to read on the blogs that I connect with!<BR/><BR/>I think we all have different purposes in blogging. Some people want community and friendship. Some people just want "creative ideas". Some people want a laugh! Some read blogs for their godly insights and some write about their faith! I guess blogs vary and deeply as we each do individually! <BR/><BR/>All that said, I totally understand that some people use their blogs to brag and toot their own horns! They use their blogs to make them feel better about their own lives and draw attention to themselves or become popular and well liked. But, I guess that happens in real life and in the blog realm! We are complicated people!<BR/><BR/>Fun post! I like the way you write and think! That's why I keep coming back to read your blog!<BR/><BR/>~ AliAlihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09787105703849235963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-3004244009624411112009-02-13T07:02:00.000-07:002009-02-13T07:02:00.000-07:00Great thought-provoking post. I could almost ditto...Great thought-provoking post. I could almost ditto His Girl's comment (except for the teenage son & twin girls thing). I try to be real...to share some struggles, while being careful to honor my husband and our family. <BR/><BR/>My prayer is that people who know me in real life & read my blog feel I am authentic in both worlds. <BR/><BR/>Still, there's something about putting EVERYTHING out there for the entire web to read, you know? I believe there are people who are called to do that, to encourage others. I know Holly @ Crown Laid Down is doing that right now - being transparent and letting Jesus shine through. I know her walk right now is a ministry to others. <BR/><BR/>I agree with Moriah, too. The purpose of the blog makes a big difference in my approach to it. I tend to read blogs of women who do share what they're learning and the struggles they're overcoming with God's help, as well as a few "home making" blogs. I don't mind feeling convicted, but I quit reading if I feel the writer isn't genuine or is just trying to make me feel bad.<BR/><BR/>You, friend, are genuine and an encouragement to me.Melissahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14488537925889589851noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-67147684088488815912009-02-12T23:05:00.000-07:002009-02-12T23:05:00.000-07:00when a friend who knows me in real life first star...when a friend who knows me in real life first started reading my blog she said to me that she wanted my life, that it sounded so perfect on my blog. it made me take a look at what i was writing and see if i was being real, but what i said to her at the time was that i didn't want to blog about the bad stuff all the time.<BR/><BR/>i don't want to moan on my blog about when it's hard to pay the bills. i don't want to whine about how my husband isn't helping out as much as i think he should and i certainly don't want to air all the troubles i have with my kids on the blog. i don't even burden my friends with most of that stuff because it passes. <BR/><BR/>it's taken me a while to find a balance between what i can let out there in public and what i have to keep hidden. because imagine the one person you would never want to read your blog (the friend you just talked about maybe) and that person will find it. <BR/><BR/>but sometimes i find i can write stuff that i can't say outloud to anyone. like the post i did at 3 weeks postpartum. <BR/><BR/>(this is more of a discussion with myself than a coherent comment.)Melissa Stoverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12839619836478423452noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-77732541209430622442009-02-12T22:38:00.000-07:002009-02-12T22:38:00.000-07:00I have just started into the world of blogging and...I have just started into the world of blogging and was thinking of starting my own. I have enjoyed your "true life" moments. Reading over your last few years that I have missed out on it is a journey of life that you can share with others who are far away and who have lost touch. I have read a few others that are a little fake- and I just choose not to go there again. <BR/>I am thinking myself to do one- of days with the boys and crazy days or staying at home...but also things from the past and lessons I have learned. In this day and age we all need a good laugh. It is depressing when all you hear is negetive news. And reading a great story about Will's b-day and lifting a sprirt is what I would like to do if I had a blog. <BR/>My Friend I would love to live closer to you so we could go get some "sonic ice" together. But since that is not so....you can always take a break every so often if you feel it overwhelming. <BR/>This is my new moto... Live today like you will never live another, because you will never get today back!Molliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17404087999714569009noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-79056596518152582742009-02-12T21:23:00.000-07:002009-02-12T21:23:00.000-07:00I thought I left a comment earlier but I guess I d...I thought I left a comment earlier but I guess I didn't, oops. <BR/><BR/>I agree with so many of the comments about it isn't always our own lives we have to consider when we blog. I have to keep private the struggles I face if I feel it would in any way embarass my family or friends or if I would be writing about something that is a confidence- whether spoken or understood. This alone, keeps me from posting on some things I go through.<BR/><BR/>The reason I started blogging was to keep our family and close friends informed about our lives and what the kids were up to. We live away from everybody and it's important to me to keep them connected. I try to keep that in mind. <BR/><BR/>Good post Mer!!Becca~CapturingSimpleJoyshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15269232073211009288noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-38300983470655672602009-02-12T20:47:00.000-07:002009-02-12T20:47:00.000-07:00Meredith, I have struggled with this so much mysel...Meredith, I have struggled with this so much myself. I am an extremely private person in real life, and so on my blog I struggle with how much to put out there. I know that I am drawn to the more authentic blogs, and I am striving to find that balance between authenticity and sharing too much. You know? But I am slowly getting to the place where I am caring less and less what people think, and I'm trying to just be real. So hard sometimes.Jackie https://www.blogger.com/profile/06689420082726915164noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-41937316214251864612009-02-12T20:23:00.000-07:002009-02-12T20:23:00.000-07:00I think I totally agree with Moriah. It depends o...I think I totally agree with Moriah. It depends on the purpose of the blog. And, for me, I don't want to be superficial and fake. I hope I come across as honest. But at the same time, I may choose to leave out certain details because I want to protect people's confidentiality and I don't want to be a downer. <BR/><BR/>One of the things I like about blogging is that it helps me focus on the positive aspects of my life. When I look back through my posts, I feel so blessed because I chose to write about the good things in my life instead of focusing on the negatives (and there are certainly things in my life that are negative...as in everyone's life!)<BR/><BR/>I also agree with Moriah that if there is a blog out there that seems too chipper and not authentic, I probably won't stay interested long. I'll just move on to other blogs that I connect with more. Yours is one of those!! :)<BR/><BR/>I have been praying for you. How are you feeling, by the way??Betsyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02020825680212161958noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-27733678224891244282009-02-12T19:07:00.000-07:002009-02-12T19:07:00.000-07:00Ah! A topic we all can relate to!! I should put a ...Ah! A topic we all can relate to!! I should put a disclaimer or some type of explanation on my blog. If you find that I am not posting as frequently as I normally do it is because I am in a DEPRESSED FUNK and I do not want to spread the depression or funkiness to others! When I get down I think of things I would like to blog about but decide against it. First I cannot stand whininess! Not a bit! I don't want to come across as whiny and second I really don't want to get anyone else down! So in a way I am not as real as I could be. I go and hide away until I'm feeling better and then my chipper self returns to blogland.<BR/><BR/>Also, I was just saying the other day, "I wish my real life friends didn't read my blog!" I had a few things I wanted to air out on my blog but couldn't because I knew things would get back around. I'm not talking about anything serious or gossipy. I'm just talking about a situation in which I would have lOVED some outside advice! Again, keeping things hidden away!!<BR/><BR/>BTW I fed my children cookies for dinner tonight! How's that for real? :)Raehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10301585140754956363noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-13246418469101573612009-02-12T18:54:00.000-07:002009-02-12T18:54:00.000-07:00Beautifully expressed Meredith. When I started blo...Beautifully expressed Meredith. When I started blogging, my mission was to be real. And I frequently do post about my shortcomings and failures. And once I was so taken aback because someone commented and told me that she was glad that I posted about having a horrible day because she felt intimidated by me. And I could not understand why...because think everyone can see that I'm often on the verge of unraveling...What I do though is pray about my posts and really try to let God lead me about what to share. I'm pretty much an open book and transparency is my passion, but I want to be transparent in a healthy way...does that make sense?Mrs.Naz@BecomingMehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05425021902893463197noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18299306.post-52225657539322349282009-02-12T18:46:00.000-07:002009-02-12T18:46:00.000-07:00James Dobson used to talk about this. About mom's...James Dobson used to talk about this. About mom's getting together with other mom's and the worst thing you can do is put on a perfect life portrayal. He said to let others see your house a mess, see your kids a mess and acting up. Otherwise you go away from their home feeling like a failure.<BR/><BR/>I feel kind of like the opposite on my blog, like I let it all hang out too much and that it isn't uplifting, just depresses people who visit!<BR/><BR/>I appreciate what you're saying, tho!Aspiemomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13720558783668971656noreply@blogger.com